Sunday, July 10, 2011


Bear's grave site...the rain washed the paint off the rocks the kids painted :(

Bear's last picture taken hours before he passed 7/9/2011

Bear putting his paw on my leg in the cage at the animal hospital

Bear 2 years ago welcoming Tyler home from his mission!!!!

Holland hugging Bear....he watched her like a hawk since I was pregnant with her when we got him:)

Our beloved family dog Bear passed away last night in his fav spot under the piano. So many emotions are going through my head as I write this....I'm used to having him sit right here by my feet as I get on the computer.....but he's not here tonight and for that I'm sad. We went to St. George over the 4th of July on our annual family trip to be with our family. We do it every year. We always leave Bear at a kennel here in Tooele. We didn't get home in time on Tuesday the 5th to pick him up. I was so sad because I always miss him when we leave, and I know how upset he is when we are gone. Michael and Bunny went down to the shop that is located right by there and could hear him barking....they thought...we should just hop the fence and go get I wish they would have. I got a call on Wednesday morning at work from the vet there saying Bear was bloated this morning and preceeded to tell me that it is quite a common sickness for dogs to get...their stomach fills up with air and they can't I'm thinking...gas....but she goes on to tell me that they usually need emergency surgery....wait..she said emergency surgery? So I'm asking how much and she says $500-600....I say can you take payments....she says no, in fact we need the money up front before we can even touch him....but she will have to do an xray to see if she is I ask if they take care credit card....she says no....I hurry and hang up, get on the internet, look for vets in tooele who take care credit....oh good....Dr. Gowans takes it....he is bear's vet.....Thad calls they are full of appts that day...thad explains that this is an emergency, and the rud lady on the phone says ...nope......what do we do? I call my son Michael, in tears by this time and ask if he can call Bunny's dad to see if he can help.....He goes and picks up Bear and rushes him to Salt Lake....the vet there assures him Bear has plenty of time......He didn't....Bear died 5 min after Michael got him there. Dr. Sharp (bunny's dad) does cpr and revives him.....he does the surgery and I get a text from thad saying they are sewing him up and the prognosis looks good....whew.....I felt good.....but I get a text later that day from bunny saying that he isn't out of the woods yet.....he is in a can this happen? I want to see him so badly, but they closed before Icould get there.....the next day, Thursday, I get a call from Bunny at 7:00 a.m.....Bear is awake! He has gone that is great! I'm just so happy....But when I talk to her dad that day, he says he hasn't walked is just a waiting game....tells me that that vet that "cared" for him was incompetant if she would have just put a tube down him, it would saved his life....he tells me he is making improvements, but has no idea how much brain damage he has suffered (he was without oxygen while he quit breathing) he gives him a 50/50 I'm taking the 50 in his favor!!! I go to see him after work.....he is in a cage and he has walked!! yeah!!!! he wagged his tail when he saw me and they said he could recoginze me, but i wasn't quite sure....he usually got so excited when he saw me...I knew he was in pain and sick, but I just wasn't sure if he recognized I got in his cage and just sat there and he put his head on my was such a tender moment....he won't eat so they were hoping I could get him to such luck....Dr. Sharp tells me about the they were gearing up to have the 2 techs lift Bear on the table and they were all amazed when Michael just picked him up like he was no weight and put him on the table....they were calling him super man...I can totally see Michael doing that...if you know him he is like 6'8" and 280 pounds.....:) So it is quitting time...I have to leave him there :(. I wasn't ready, but I tell him I"ll see him tomorrow and tell him he needs to eat for me. The next day after work I go there and he still hasn't eaten....he has pooped straight blood which is scary, but he kind of trotted while he was going outside to potty....ok, Bear....I get in the cage and take some pictures...he was shaking my hand and smiling at me....I know he knows who I am this time....he didn't seem like he felt very good though....He wasn't as alert as he was the day before....Again I tried to get him to eat....he's NEVER turned down food! In fact, he usually would eat things he wasn't supposed to after we went to bed!!! So again, it's closing time.....I is my mom's 73rd birthday, so we head to my sis's for a party. The next morning , I get a call from the office saying that Dr. Sharp wants me to take him home so we can see if maybe he'll eat when he is in his own environment....yeah!!!! I'm so excited .....I shower, throw some clothes on and drive into Salt Lake to get my dog!!!!! It's been over a week since we left for St. George, so he hasn't been there since we took him to the kennel....I go in there and they take his iv out and we get some pain pills down him and he walks out to car with me.....he knows which car mine is walks right to it and climbs in....I talked to him all the way home.....he has his head up in the middle and I'm just so happy to have him coming home....I've missed my shadow!!! He goes in the house and walks straight to the sliding glass door and goes out to go potty.....he comes back in and lays down by the couch in the living room....We pet him and try to make him comfortable...Michael comes over and helps me "force feed" him some chicken....I'm so worried because I know he needs to eat....he does drink water for me...he did that the day before I felt good about that....I need to take Holland to the dr. because I'm pretty sure she has strep (she did) and when we came home, he wasn't on his blanket! I call his name, and he is sitting in the hall by Holland's bedroom where Valerie was watching a movie....he had followed her down the hall when she went there...he came back out and went under the kitchen table...another one of his favorite places....Tyler and Jen come out and give him loves, but tyler notices he is breathing harder and he was....I knew he was in pain....I had to wait to give him his pain pill for another 2 the time we got to give him that, you could tell he was in pain....I tried it in peanut butter...that didn't work....then we put it in hot dogs....we got him to take took a while to kick in...but it did....then we were downstairs watching harry potter, and I asked Holland to go check on him because I thought I heard him....she went to go check and there he was....he had come down the stairs!!! I didn't think he could.....he came over and laid by me and I just pet and rubbed him....he put his head on my lap and I just felt so sorry for him that he had to go through this, but I just kept telling myself that it must have been meant to be because I had been praying that if he could live a normal life to let him survive, if not to let him go peacefully....I figured this was the answer to my prayer and that he was going to be with us for many more years....I went upstairs to get Eli a drink and Bear came up and followed me to the sliding glass door....he went out and pooped and peed again and then just went over the middle of the grass and layed there for a lot of the afternoon...he just seemed to be basking in the sun, but he also was acting like he was in pain again.....I tried to offer water to him....he wouln't take it....he came over by the deck and let me pet him while Eli played in the jeep....Michael and Bunny started BBQing steaks...he came in and went to the front door went out on the porch and was standing funny like he was hurt....I had him come back in where he went to lay under the piano....that is another one of his favorite places....he breaths really heavy from that time on...I put ice on his stiching...because he was quivering like he was in total pain....he starts biting on the piano pedal...I bring water over to him...he bites on the dish.....I know he is in a lot of pain at this point, but I can't give him another pill for another couple of hours....Michael goes over to him....and I remember looking in there and I don't see Bears belly moving....where it was so fast before...I say "michael, is he not breathing?" Michael calls Bunny over....she tries to call her dad, no answer, and she says "he's not breathing".....I start crying, I'm holding Eli....he is just looking at me and giving me loves....I can't go in there and look at Bear....I can't stand the thought of see his lifeless body.....I can't believe this is happening.....Michael comes and hugs me, Jackson is asking what is wrong and I tell him Bear is gone, and he says "no he's not, he is right there"...I knew he didn't understand, but I just told him that his body is there, but Bear is with Heavenly Father now. Holland comes in and is very upset...we all just sit and cry....I blame myself....I keep trying to think of what I could have done differently.....I"m so grateful that Bunny and Michael are there .... I don't even know what to do.....I wasn't ready for this....I knew he was sick, but I just felt he would make it....We decide to bury him where his kennel in the back used to be....Michael works for a long time digging the was really hard ground....We call Valerie home....Michael places in in the 2 blankets he used that day....and gave me his collar....Bunny says a prayer....the kiddies had painted rocks for him and put them on there we placed roses on there and put a wind twirly on it.....then we all just sit in silence.....minus the tears and the sniffles.....We tell of our favorite memories of Bear which include: trying to get bear to run in front of the stroller and him just sitting his rear end down until I'd catch up :) (I would always ask whoever I was walking to try to run ahead....because I thought it was so funny he wouldn't do it!!!) he always had to be by me and the stroller), bear ripping up countless blinds, floor boards, and our couch.....(in bunny's prayer she asked heavenly father to let him rip up as many blinds as he wanted!:) , bear coming upstairs every morning at 1:30 a.m. to check all the rooms, bear coming to sleep with me when Thad wasn't there (when he was here, bear didn't even go in our room), following me wherever I went in the house, making valerie feel like she was a fast runner because she would have to pull him basically, watching him stay with bunny at the park, while the other dogs just went wild.....and many more.....We were laughing and crying as we remembered bringing him home! I was pregnant with Holland and I'll never forget going to the pound to pick out a dog....we took several dogs outside and none of them felt right....then she asked if we had seen, where is he? She brought us out to the front porch...he was just laying there....we all fell in love with him instantly.....Even though he suffered from seperation anxiety..and destroyed more things that we can even count, we loved that dog because he loved us!!! He was the most loyal, loving dog in the world....I'm going to miss his slobbery nose in the window when I pull in the driveway to come home.....He was sooooo excited to see me.....He made me feel needed and loved and has been with me some of my most difficult times.....he seemed to know when I was sad.....he would lay by me when I was sick, he was even in the bathroom when I bathed the kids....he seemed to always be by my feet.....He loved to go walking....when I would say walk, he would go was so funny....he used to get up with me really early every morning and it's like he knew when the alarm clock was going to ring because he would wake before my alarm rang.....I'm going to miss you Bear....thank you for putting up with our crazy family....Thank you for your loyalty, thank you for watching over us.....Thank you for letting us share 7 wonderful years with you.....I know you are running carefree in heaven with Gus and putting up with sparky! Watch over us....We'll never forget our bearsy boats!!!!!

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